here are some translated notes from what I written down on paper

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Why do you feel that you are not allowed to cry? why aren’t you allowed to be sad about things? because I will get punished by people and they reject me, and get angry at me. and they then want to take things away from me. I should not overreact was something mom and dad said. they didn’t care about my true emotions. my emotions and will should not be a burden to them. Yes I remember that quite well, they didn’t want to really know what I thought or felt. I only had a limited options to chose from that I would think would be approved by them. but this was making me into a empty shell. that desired fro expression and emotion. however you are adult now, you are much bigger and stronger then they are. so they can no longer hurt you. but what if they take my stuff. yes that behaviour they still have in them. but expressing your self that you find this not acceptable is now the way to protect yourself. really? yes, this is the best thing to do. what your thinking, feeling show it and let it flow. this also more healthy for you and will improve your live in general. ———————————————————